you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
