We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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