whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
