It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
