I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Randomize
