Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Thank you for not boning my boss.
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
Randomize
