those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Hurry up. Some creepy guy with a "God is vengeful" flyer is asking where I wanna go most today. I think he's going to chop me into pieces.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
