I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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