You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
