I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
MIDGETS
????
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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