508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
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