so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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