dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
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Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
woke up next to her writing my name in some journal. apparently she makes every guy she hooks up with sign out.
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
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Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
How naked do you want me to be?
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