I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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