I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Randomize