remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
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