I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
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