Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(217): View more from Illinois

i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.

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(425): View more from Washington

im bored tell me something entertaining

(206): View more from Washington

You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.

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(571): View more from Virginia

What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in

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(214): View more from Texas

Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead

(972): View more from Texas

Please do that

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