Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
