So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
Michael Bay diarrhea
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
