THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
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