I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
Randomize
