I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
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My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
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you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Pretty sure I scared her away last night by putting a vodka tampon in my ass
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