Walk of Shame. In a state park.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
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