So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
