He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
