I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
sex in a hospital.. check
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
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