so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
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It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Carver called his mom a milf again
Was it on purpose this time?
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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