Texts From Last Night

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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping

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  (724): Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping http://tfl.nu/9juf
  Replies (5) Good night (826) Bad night (1128)
• Favorite

  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying

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  (202): either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying http://tfl.nu/ahxy
  Replies (2) Good night (631) Bad night (1050)
• Favorite

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg

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  (508): he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg http://tfl.nu/z4cs
  Replies (5) Good night (658) Bad night (2848)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.

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  (803): i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move. http://tfl.nu/ml5e
  Replies (15) Good night (1555) Bad night (4577)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.

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  (503): my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed. http://tfl.nu/r7o8
  Replies (5) Good night (1244) Bad night (5629)
• Favorite

  (856): View more from New Jersey

  They are making fun of natty and blackberries.

  (646): View more from New York

  Tell them they are ugly.

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  (856): They are making fun of natty and blackberries. (646): Tell them they are ugly. http://tfl.nu/s2y1
  Replies (8) Good night (3988) Bad night (1175)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  ...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."

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  (310): ...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately." http://tfl.nu/g8d2
  Replies (4) Good night (3603) Bad night (1068)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.

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  (630): I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy. http://tfl.nu/cb6u
  Replies (5) Good night (1331) Bad night (2780)
• Favorite

  (605): View more from South Dakota

  and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.

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  (605): and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno. http://tfl.nu/gxse
  Replies (10) Good night (5880) Bad night (962)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE

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  (902): OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE http://tfl.nu/77eb
  Replies (7) Good night (742) Bad night (2722)
• Favorite

  (903): View more from Texas

  The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today

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  (903): The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today http://tfl.nu/xr2c
  Replies (4) Good night (1622) Bad night (658)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.

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  (207): I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg. http://tfl.nu/2hwi
  Replies (11) Good night (2540) Bad night (826)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.

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  (571): I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone. http://tfl.nu/igvc
  Replies (9) Good night (1181) Bad night (757)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.

  (1-520): View more from Arizona

  I can pencil you in at 3:30

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  (520): Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk. (1-520): I can pencil you in at 3:30 http://tfl.nu/ztyv
  Replies (8) Good night (3079) Bad night (973)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.

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  (+44): Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life. http://tfl.nu/4vxb
  Replies (14) Good night (1902) Bad night (584)

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