if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize