frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
