So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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