chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
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