fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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