i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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