I would go down on you faster than GM stock
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
She dumped me and then asked if I wanted to come to her improv show. Fuck theatre majors, man.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
He has the fingertips of a God
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
