Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
