Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Randomize
