This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
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