Ketchup is God's man juice
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
