you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
