she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
