whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
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