hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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