Where is the hickey?
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Tempting. But I already used the alcohol poisoning excuse at work this month. No way he would believe it a second time...
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.