tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Did I show you my penis last night?
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I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
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