And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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