that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
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