we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
Just invented taco cereal.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
You may now shotgun with the bride
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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