I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Randomize
